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2 hours ago, Hoyaheel said:

16 is an age where she (Suri) can make this decision??

I think so.  Adult is considered 18, but in terms of where kid gets to live judge let's 16 and older pick which parent they live with/spend time with - right??

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I think it depends on the state, but I do know older kids are heard by the judge on who they want to live with/spend time with when there is a custody issue.

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I guess that is applicable in cases where the parent and/or kid complains? I didn't (guess my father did not either) so it didn't happen for me. My (step)father went to court to get physical custody of his son when he was 13 or 14 because that's what my brother wanted. His older sister did not and I think spoke out against it in the court. (I was only 13 at the time too, so they didn't share all the details with me). It was a bitch of a custody battle, apparently.....

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There is no age at which a child can legally decide their own custody or visitation. Until the child turns 18 the court can still disregard their wishes and order them to live with or see a parent they would rather not see or not see a parent they wish to see. However, at age 14 the court is required to take the kid’s wishes into account even if they ultimately disregard them. Prior to that, it’s at the judge’s discretion whether they want to hear what the child wants. At age 12, children get a say in whether or not they’re adopted. Before 12, a child can be forced into an adoption they don’t want. I thought the age at which children would get a say in court would be the same for custody and adoption but apparently not. 

Edited by witchkitten
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Is that just CA or NY or is that all states? I would think states would be all over the place as they are with age of (sexual) consent, age of marriage etc......

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Fourteen is the most common age specified for when a judge is required to consider the child’s wishes but many states don’t specify the age and instead use language like a “‘mature child”. I think in many of those states, though, 14 is the unspoken age. A few do specify 12 as the age at which a judge is required to take the child’s wishes into account. Georgia is an outlier. They require that a judge consider a child’s preference at 11 and they are the only state that specifies that a 14 year old can decide which parent they live with, however, a judge can overrule the child’s wishes so it’s still ultimately up to the court. 

Edited by witchkitten
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