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Hoyaheel

Kill (or "ditch)/Screw/Marry

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I thought we had a thread on this already but I used a few search terms and didn't see it - if I missed it, and someone else finds it, I'll ask Princess to merge the threads!!

 

Marry: GOP Hopefuls Edition!

Thu., Mar. 8, 2012 9:20 AM PST by TEAM TRUTH

Prepare yourself: Worst. Question. Ever.

 

‘Cause there's no sexy Sarah Palin to save you from this round of Ditch, Do or Marry. It's been too long since we last played our fave game, so in honor of Super Tuesday going down this week—and inspired by one truly evil reader—we're pitting those GOP guys plaguing the news against each other.

 

Not for president though, but to find out which guy you'd kick to the curb and which you'd keep forever. Between…

 

Mitt Romney, Rick Santorum and Newt Gingrich.

 

First up is Romney, who won Super Tuesday and seems to have the best chance of scoring that gig in the White House—though we use that term only relative to the other contenders and not to say he actually has a chance at being our next President—so keep that in mind, potential First Ladies (sorry, Ann).

 

Cons? He's Mormon (startlingly homophobic organization) and likes to make ads about how wrong gay marriage is, for one. But on the bright side, he's rich as hell—seriously, millions upon millions—and he's got a decent head of hair and a good tan.

 

Then there's Santorum, who's sitting in Mitt's shadow. He doesn't seem to like gays (or their rights to marriage or ability to serve in the army, though he does know you can't tell a gay by the color of their skin), thinks college is for snobs, is arguably racist and if you're a woman? He definitely has opinions on your rights.

 

So say adios to your birth control (he doesn't believe in it) and say hello to having two handfuls of kids (he's already got 7). Pros? He too has a good head of hair! And at a spry 53, he's the youngest of the bunch.

 

Last but not least, there's good old Newty. Though he may often trail Ron Paul in polls, Gingrich (who became a contender in the race after Herman Cain dropped out) has more of a media splash, though he's trailing very far behind in the current crop.

 

Cons? He has a habit of ditching wives for even younger women (he's done it twice before) and his ex-wife Marianne Gingrich told Nightline he's a fan of open marriages. Pros? You guessed it, that mop of grey hair ain't half bad.

 

So those are your contenders, Awful readers, and now it's your turn to pick which Republi-dude you'd want to tie the knot with, which you'd like for a night of sweet, sweet lovin' (takes all kinds) and which you want to leave behind forever.

 

While our bleeding liberal hearts wait, let your heart guide you as you get to clickin'!

 

 

Read more: http://www.eonline.com/news/the_awful_trut...0#ixzz1odEtMCn8

Edited by Hoyaheel

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Kill- Gingrich

Fuck- Santorum (only if I can gag him....)

Marry- Romney (hey, loads of money, not bad looking - I could handle that if I had to ;) )

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Kill-Newt

Kill-Santorum

Kill-Romney

 

Wait, is that wrong?

 

It's not too far off what I was thinking myself :D

 

However, I'd consider marrying Romney just for the money. But Santorum has to go and there's no way I'm screwing Newt.

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Kill-Newt

Kill-Santorum

Kill-Romney

 

Wait, is that wrong?

That's why this game is HARD. It's not like I'm making you choose between Brad Pitt, George Clooney, and Santorum. That's easy ;-)

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So in the blinds, Princess just said she'd fuck Ryan Reynolds, and Ben Affleck was also in the blind, so....

 

Kill, Marry or Fuck? Ryan Reynolds, Ben Affleck and Harrison Ford (because that was the first name to come up next to the other two when I googled! Comic-Con ;-)

 

 

[after you respond, feel free to add 3 new names - celebs, politics as in the old thread, etc]

Edited by Hoyaheel

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So in the blinds, Princess just said she'd fuck Ryan Reynolds, and Ben Affleck was also in the blind, so....

 

Kill, Marry or Fuck? Ryan Reynolds, Ben Affleck and Harrison Ford (because that was the first name to come up next to the other two when I googled! Comic-Con ;-)

 

 

[after you respond, feel free to add 3 new names - celebs, politics as in the old thread, etc]

 

:alien_dance:

 

Fuck Ryan Reynolds

Kill Ben Affleck

Marry Harrison Ford

 

FYI, I had dinner in downtown La Jolla last Friday nite, the same evening Star Wars was doing their panel at Comic Con. I called my favorite steak house Eddie V's to make a reservation, and I was told the entire restaurant was booked that night for a special event. Pretty sure Star Wars panel did an after party there. I was going to try to stalk Han Solo after we had dinner at La Velencia down the street instead, but the food and wine was so good we didn't have the energy to walk down to Eddie Vs for some star watching. But going to brag that Han Solo was almost mine anyways :D

 

Next up:

Sam Worthington

Ryan Gossling

Giovanni Ribisi

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Ryan Reynolds F*ck

Ben Affleck Kill

Harrison Ford Marry (ahhhhh Han Solo)

 

Here's the next......

 

Idris Elba

Kevin Spacey

Paul Rudd

 

I took too long to post, so next player has to answer both :D

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Idris Elba

Kevin Spacey

Paul Rudd

Marry Paul Rudd (duh!) Fuck Idris Elba, Kill Kevin Spacey

 

 

Next up:

Sam Worthington

Ryan Gossling

Giovanni Ribisi

 

Ugh, don't like any. Kill Ribisi ($cieno), Marry Worthington, Fuck Gosling?

 

Next: Choose 3 members from One Direction ;-) Niall Horan, Liam Payne, Harry Styles,Louis Tomlinson, Zayn Malik

Edited by Hoyaheel
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Sorry - don't know enough about One Direction boys to make a choice on that.

 

In honor of Canadian Thanksgiving:

 

Nathan Fillion, Ryan Gosling, Ryan Reynolds

Edited by Freckles
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This one is easy.

 

Marry Fillion, shag Gosling, and kill Reynolds

 

You didn't give the next person 3 names ;-)

 

I would marry Fillion, shag Reynolds, and kill Gosling. The "brooding" thing drives me crazy.

 

Up next - Late night tv: Jimmy Fallon, Jimmy Kimmel, Seth Meyers

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This one is easy.

 

Marry Fillion, shag Gosling, and kill Reynolds

You didn't give the next person 3 names ;-)

 

I would marry Fillion, shag Reynolds, and kill Gosling. The "brooding" thing drives me crazy.

 

Up next - Late night tv: Jimmy Fallon, Jimmy Kimmel, Seth Meyers

I'm just going to pretend that instead of Seth Meyers you wrote Stephen Colbert because he's on at the same time as the other two and I really know nothing about Seth. So marry Stephen Colbert, screw Jimmy Kimmel but only because Jimmy Fallon annoys me so I'm going to kill him.

 

Up next - Old Hollywood Edition: Cary Grant, Clark Gable, Humphrey Bogart

 

(Aside from the substitution I hope I did that right.)

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Marry Bogart - of the three the less likely to stray

Screw Grant - he's beautiful and funny

Kill Gable - always looked smarmy to me

 

Up next: That 70s Show: Ashton Kutcher, Topher Grace, Kurtwood Smith (I may have a slight crush on Red )

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Topher annoys me, so....

 

Marry Kurtwood Smith (yeah, I love bald sarcastic guys!!), screw Ashton (he's probably not too bad in bed) and kill Topher.

 

Action Figures - choose old or new:

 

Old: Harrison Ford, Sylvester Stallone (you can pretend it's the 80s version of him!), Steven Seagal or Jean Claude Van Damme

 

New: Chris Pratt, Chris Evans, Chris Hemsworth

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Marry Chris Pratt (a cutie), kill Chris Evans (a fug) and screw Chris Hemsworth with a bag over his head (a butterface).

 

The post-Thanksgiving, unappealing Canadian edition:

 

Seth Rogan, Michael Cera, Jim Carrey

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Tee hee, searching for something else and just found this thread. Perhaps time to revive it?

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The post-Thanksgiving, unappealing Canadian edition:

 

Seth Rogan, Michael Cera, Jim Carrey

 

Well, since no one responded, and Princess wants to revive, I'll start here :-)

 

Marry: Rogen

Screw: eek. Um, Carrey

Kill: Cera. I can't help it. That emo millennial thing bugs me. But it's a close one with Carrey - I don't like him either.

 

Next up.....2017 Oscar best song nominees: John Legend, Lin Manuel Miranda, Justin Timberlake

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Next up.....2017 Oscar best song nominees: John Legend, Lin Manuel Miranda, Justin Timberlake

 

 

Kill Lin

Mary John

Screw Justin

John always seems so nice in interviews. Justin is nice to look at, but have you heard him speak?? And no idea about Lin so sorry buddy, but you're a goner.

 

Up next:

Donald Trump, Kanye West and Jay Z. Because I'm mean :D

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Donald Trump - Kill

 

Kanye - Screw - One time only

 

Jay Z - Marry - for the money of course

 

 

Up Next:

 

Bill O'Reilly

 

Anderson Cooper

 

Mike Pence

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Next up.....2017 Oscar best song nominees: John Legend, Lin Manuel Miranda, Justin Timberlake

Kill Lin

Mary John

Screw Justin

John always seems so nice in interviews. Justin is nice to look at, but have you heard him speak?? And no idea about Lin so sorry buddy, but you're a goner.

 

Up next:

Donald Trump, Kanye West and Jay Z. Because I'm mean :D

 

 

YOU HAD AN OPPORTUNITY TO KILL JT AND YOU DIDN'T TAKE IT?!?!?!

 

PRINCESS, I AM SO DISAPPOINTED IN YOU! :monkey:

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