leaivory

But this makes mommy so cool! What was the BI awhile back about the parent who snorted coke or did drugs of some sort with their daughter? I remember the guesses being Hohan and others but maybe this was the pair?

Maybe you're thinking of this article from a while back...

 

Griffith's plan goes to pot as son becomes addict

 

Chicago Sun-Times, Sep 23, 2002 by Bill Zwecker

 

Melanie Griffith has learned--the hard way--how an offhand comment can come back to haunt you. Back in 2000, the actress snared a ton of headlines and lots of criticism for saying she would prefer to smoke marijuana with her son--if he ever wanted to try it.

 

Apparently, her son held her to her statement. "I did, and it backfired," Griffith tells the new issue of More magazine. According to the Oscar-nominated actress, her son Alexander, 17, (fathered by Steven Bauer) became so addicted to marijuana and other drugs that he now is in Narcotics Anonymous. "My thinking was that it would be better for him to do it at home than to go out in the street and get something that would kill him.

 

"I thought it was a good idea, but ultimately, it wasn't," said Griffith, adding, "definitely, I won't make that mistake with my other two [children, Stella and Dakota]. Griffith's thinking was obviously strange, given the well-documented evidence of genetic predisposition to addiction. Not only has the actress battled alcohol and drug problems since her teens, but Bauer, the boy's father, has a similar history.

 

Griffith does admit her fight against her addictions is truly "one day at a time," and she says her regular attendance at 12-step Alcoholics Anonymous meetings keeps her sober. "Sometimes I just want to get wasted ...have a glass of wine ...but I can't."

But they will be in court in February to tackle one issue: Mills wants McCartney to pay for a bodyguard for her because, she says, she has been threatened and followed.

 

Okay Heather.. . .but who will protect you from the bodyguard?

 

Why would she want to live like that? Why not move to a country where everyone doesn't hate her... oh wait, there's isn't one...

Campbell To Guest Star on 'Ugly Betty'

She says of her role: "On Ugly Betty I'll play a loony who loves to shop and can't find a man. I like that sort of role."

Yeah, like that'll require acting...

Golden Globes Awards Fug: Dreamgirls

 

 

EDDIE: Just look suave, Eddie, just look suave. If you act cool enough they won't even remember you have another one of those fat-suit movies coming out in a few weeks.

 

JENNIFER: Wow, my hair really DOES look good this way. And I'm so glad I chose this navy dress -- I have to say, I feel pretty hot right now.

 

BEYONCE: Yeah, fine, smile it up, TV bitch - let's just all remember who only held back on her singing voice because they MADE her, because she was TOO FIERCE for her role. Was it you? NO. Was it the From Justin To Kelly chick? NO. Was it that other bitch? NO. CHECK IT, hos, it was ME.

 

JAMIE: Man, Hudson looks fine. Almost as fine as I do, although nobody could outfox the Foxx. Miss B over there must be pissed-- she looks so Las Vegas that her dress even has its own coin slot up there. HAHAHAHAHA, oh, Foxxy, you've still got the funny, baby!

 

JENNIFER: I hope Beyonce isn't mad at me.

 

BEYONCE: No, I'm serious, hos, are you checking it? You'd BEST. Because I can't believe I am playing second fiddle to some bitch Paula Abdul dug up out of obscurity. Seriously. The claws are coming OUT. And so is her HAIR.

 

JENNIFER: I also hope Beyonce doesn't try and pull out my hair. She keeps accidentally touching it and she looks kind of like she's plotting something. I can't help it that I have a great stylist and she just has her mother. I didn't do that to her.

 

BEYONCE: It is ALL HER FAULT that I didn't win. Lady, I could sing circles around your ass, and Simon Cowell would CRY and Randy Jackson would be all, "You're doing your thing, dog, and that thing is KICKING SERIOUS ASS," and Paula would go, "If I ordered a pizza right now they'd deliver it to Montana because that was so good you almost made me want to eat some mascara and there are rainbows here and where am I? Are you my mother?" ...

 

EDDIE: I wonder if they'll burn the print of my next movie if I pay them enough money.

 

BEYONCE: ...and then Simon would be all, "What Paula is trying to say is that you are perfection, and you're the best there has ever been and I don't need to see any more," and then they'd CANCEL THE SHOW because there was no way they could do better and THAT is how I would WIN American Idol, you sad little runner-up, you.

 

EDDIE: No, really. I don't want to be all Queen Latifah here, winning a major award and then having a craptravaganza like Taxi coming out right afterward. But at least I look smooth. What the hell was Beyonce thinking? If we hang her from the ballroom ceiling they can turn off all the other lights and have a real cheap electric bill.

 

JENNIFER: Oh, well, I'll just try not to think about Beyonce. After all, I've never felt this good about myself in my life. Seriously, I think I deserve to be very proud of myself.

 

BEYONCE: Ohh, yes, just get ready, you humble little trophy hound, you. It's COMING.

 

JAMIE: DANG, bitches, I'm glad I took my shades off -- I'll get a better view of the catfight this way. Come on, let's see some clawing and spanking. Y'all can mess up my tux if it means I see some girl-on-girl without having to go back to my hotel room first. Let's get it ON.

 

JENNIFER: Although... I really should remember to get that restraining order ready.

 

Go Fug Yourself

And Heather believes she can survive the rigours of a dance contest, despite being an amputee.

WTF? Isn't she the one who had to crawl down the hall in the middle of the night to find the potty?

Golden Globes Fug Carpet: Beyonce

 

If you'd asked me two days ago what Beyonce Knowles might wear to the Golden Globes if she were feeling terribly predictable, I'd have said, "Probably something low-cut and gold -- really sparkly. With a slit. And a big ol' weave."

 

Looks like Fate tipped its Magic 8-Ball over and saw that it said, "Signs Point To Yes."

 

 

It's not that she doesn't look beautiful; she does. She's Beyonce. Being a knockout with a hot body is her trademark. But don't you feel like you've seen this before? I mean, on her, not just in the Pier 1 Imports upscale gift-wrap section? And don't you wonder why, precisely, it makes that tiny wee gap in the front just under her cleavage? And then do you think that maybe she's wearing it because it's secretly made of 1,000 mashed-up Golden Globe trophies and the blood of a unicorn, all as part of a voodoo ritual intended to bag her a victory and a surprise Oscar nomination? And for the Oscars themselves, do you wonder what the odds are that Miss B will wear a dress made of Jennifer Hudson's mashed-up Golden Globe and the blood of Jamie Foxx? Indeed, do you wonder if the scene-stealing Dreamgirl is going to find a beheaded chicken on her doorstep one day this week? Can Beyonce get an Oscar nod when she was outacted by her false eyelashes? And what was the wig and cosmetics budget for Dreamgirls, anyway?

 

Sigh. So many questions.

 

Go Fug Yourself

Golden Globes Well-Played: America Ferrera

 

There are many things I like about America Ferrera. For one thing, I think she's adorable on Ugly Betty, in a role that could too easily be cloying, or sad-sack-y. I loved her in The Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants, not that I saw that, or cried at it. And I love that she's probably the only actress her age in Hollywood currently sporting her own hair, breasts and teeth.

 

I also love her in this dress:

 

 

The color and the cut are both really good on her: they flatter her skin tone and her body without being boring. She looks tall and curvy. Which, by the way, I don't mean as a Euphemism For Fat. I hate the fact that "curvy" now means, in Secret Hollywood Patois, "tubby." For example, according to Star Magazine, Jessica Alba recently said to a journalist, "I know I'm curvy. I'm working on it." Fast-forward to Jessica Alba dropping ten pounds she didn't need to drop. CURVY IS GOOD, PEOPLE. Curvy is sexy and feminine, not Marlon-Brando-In-A- MuuMuu-Fat. Women -- all women: naturally very thin women, naturally not so thin women, flat-chested women, big-breasted women, ALL WOMEN -- have, as we learned from America's debut film, some curves of some size somewhere on their body. IT'S OKAY.

 

I was thinking about this yesterday (in between trying to figure out what our government should do about Darfur and meditating on the existence of God in the 21st century, obviously), and I came to the conclusion that I seriously think America is so freaking cute and fresh-faced, and her body looks GREAT here, and therefore, I really hate the idea that at some point, she is going to drop twenty pounds and start Mystic-Tanning the shit out of herself, just because someone told her she had to do that to be considered for more mainstream roles. Because you KNOW someone is going to do that. Because, as you may have noticed, as a rule, certain people in Hollywood tend to have their heads up their asses regarding the subject of How All Women Are Supposed To Look In Order To Be Considered Sexy. When, really, America shouldn't do a thing: as Mark Darcy said to Bridget Jones, we like her very much. Just as she is.

 

Which, for the record, is adorable in a perfectly-tailored purpley/navy number.

 

Go Fug Yourself

What was she wrong about?

Mulesing involves cutting a piece of skin from a sheep’s backside to protect it from deadly fly-strike. Pink is right - it is not pleasant, but it stops sheep being eaten alive by maggot infestations.

 

Australian farmers say there is no cost-effective alternative yet.

 

(ETA They are not my words but from another article explaining the answer to your question.)

Pink backflip on boycott pleases wool industry

1:13 PM January 17

 

The wool industry has welcomed an admission by US singer Pink that she failed to properly research the practice of sheep mulesing before she made a video condemning the practice.

 

The singer caused a furore when she called for consumers to boycott Australian wool as part of a campaign by the group People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals (PETA).

 

Pink has given a television interview saying she was misinformed about the practice.

 

The president of WoolProducers, Robert Peach, says he is glad Pink has backed away from her earlier comments.

 

"She's been totally caught out and we appreciate that she's retracted it," he said.

 

"But in the meantime, it has done the industry some damage.

 

"We as industry have really taken this whole issue of animal welfare very seriously over a long period of time.

 

"It's just sad that people like Pink actually don't do the research before they make the sort of statements they do."

 

Source: ABC

news.com.au

 

This is from Norm's column today (1/16/07)

 

Edmonds, the ex-wife of singer Kenneth "Babyface" Edmonds, attended the New York premiere of "Dreamgirls" with Murphy and said they have been dating since October. Murphy attended pal Johnny Gill's show at Boulder Station on Saturday and went onstage with music producer Jimmy Jam and Eddie Levert. Barry Bonds was in the audience.

Can you say orgie? Three men and a woman.

 

I don't think she would have been invited.

 

 

Steven Cojocaru has stopped doing whatever drugs he was doing, and has blown up almost as big as a Macy's Turkey Day balloon. Here he is pictured with the Antichrist, Rachel Zoe.

 

I think he had to have a kidney transplant and his health was in jeopardy for a while. I don't know if this might have anything to do with his weight gain.

 

 

LOLOL at the photo with Zoe.

They look like twins!

 

I think he looks like Chastity Bono in the second photo.

Who leaves their husband for a notorious man-slut & doesn't expect to get dumped? I think Kate isn't losing sleep over this & I doubt he was the only reason she left her dirty, smelly looking hubby.

Owen is a stallion & can't be tamed, he must be free He's so insanly charming & I can't resist an intelligent & funny man.

ITA about expecting nothing from that relationship and that Kate and Chris had bigger problems. That said, I still think Owen Wilson is a total ARSE. “Owen is calling girlfriends to tell them he is single.” Who cares? Wanker.

WHAT SHE WANTS:

Four homes:

- $8-million mansion in St. John's Wood, London

- $12-million home in Beverly Hills, Calif.

- $10-million apartment and offices in New York

- $3-million log cabin in Sussex

Maintenance staff, housekeepers and gardeners for all the homes

Nanny until Beatrice is 18

Two helicopter rides a week

Access to private plane

Bodyguards for her and Beatrice

Cars for each home (to be replaced every two years)

Annual holidays for her and Beatrice

Replace electrical, computer goods every two years

Clothing allowance for her and Beatrice

Private schooling for Beatrice

Child maintenance

Entertainment allowance

Grocery and fuel allowance

Private health care for her and Beatrice

$100 million lump sum

Child maintenance? She's already listed private schooling, clothing, food, a nanny, bodyguards, annual holidays, and private health care. What else could child maintenance possibly cover?

Dreamfugs

Sometimes, Beyonce Knowles gets it right; other times, she's maddeningly wrong. But it's not often that she hits both notes in one day. At one location.

 

Exhibit A: The Good.

Aside from the fact that she and Miss Tyra Banks could have a seriously fierce weave-off -- the likes of which could, nay WOULD, change the meaning of life for us all -- Beyonce looks quite pretty. We love that she has a normal body and love it even more when she drapes it well. Here, she's a gentle hourglass.

 

And now for something completely different.

This is Exhibit B: The Bad, in which the sands of the aforementioned hourglass have officially all reached the lower chamber. Beyonce looks less like superstar than a shell-shocked diner employee who, as part of a surprise contest win, was plucked from the restaurant during her shift and deposited on the set of TRL as a guest co-host. That skirt, built-in apron and all, is a veritable tent; she could throw a Girl Scouts jamboree under there.

 

She also appears to be molting, which brings us to Exhibit C: The Ugly.

Now she's not just a diner employee -- she's a fired extra from the ill-fated The Muppets Take Manhattan Sam's House of Bacon, in which our merry band of Hensonites would have opened up a greasy spoon, had this nutter not accidentally sat on one of the main characters during a coffee break.

 

Why she wore this when she had something better on a nearby hanger, I really don't know. Sure, she wore the red dress on Letterman later, but come on -- there can't be that much overlap in those demographics. Sure, maybe that striped-shirt dude with the crazy eyes and gleaming maw would tune in to obsess over her Late Show appearance, but he's about to be arrested for plucking the bird, I think, so that's a moot point.

 

We would call it a wash, but the feathered derriere actually counts as a full second point against the aqua outfit, so the final score is: Tina Knowles' DNA 2, Rational Thought 1.

 

Dang. Better luck next time, Beyonce.

 

Go Fug Yourself

Fug The Cover: Janet Jackson

We've been fugging a lot of covers lately, begging the question: What is up with January magazine covers? Traditionally, January issues are thin and flat -- like a bad hair day -- presumably because mag staffers are exhausted from putting together the December issues, which generally could be used to weight down a body. You know, if you were that kind of a girl. So I guess it's not too surprising that a lot of January covers are kind of lackluster. And yet I could not let Janet Jackson's appearance on Singapore's Harper's Bazaar pass without comment:

To be blunt about it: Is there some law that Janet Jackson can not appear on the cover of any major magazine in pants? Remember her W cover? This is almost exactly the same concept. I mean, it's more Wholesome 80s Super Model Going For a Dip in the Pool After Some Refreshing Tab, while that one was more...freaky. But, seriously: We know, you lost a whole lot of weight. Your body looks nice. Excuse me, according to the cover, it is "killer." (And I don't think the use of the phrase "the skinny" on the cover is a coincidence, either.) But would it kill you to CONSIDER PANTS on occasion? EVEN THIN PEOPLE WEAR PANTS. We'll still KNOW that your ass is smaller than it used to be. You can PUT IT AWAY NOW.

 

Go Fug Yourself

This is really interesting, Soho. I didn't know that the camera REALLY added that much weight. The thing I find odd is that most men really do not prefer stick thin women. All men I know would rather that a woman had some curves, so the anorexic Nicole Richie look is just not the ideal for men. Somehow it has become an ideal for young women and THAT is what we need to change. I have a daughter who understands all of this, yet just told me offhandedly that she WISHES she was as thin as Nicole Richie. I said she looks dead, yea, but she's really skinny, Mom. ARRGGGHHHH.

ITA mf'smom. My husband and other men I know (brother, friends, etc) HATE the way that women want to look like 8-year-old boys. They want to see the curves that come naturally when you're a woman. I wish the media and today's society would catch up to that.

Heather Mills wants Sienna to star in her biopic

Heather reportedly wants Sienna Miller to play her in a film about her life... Heather sees herself in Sienna Miller... ” [AHN]

'Course she does. They're both dirty skanks.

Just read this... So funny

 

Eddie needs to keep in mind that she was called "Scary Spice" for a reason. Some night he's going to pull over to pick Mel up, thinking she's a tranny in trouble. And she's going to kill his ass.

 

A Socialite's Life

I am liking her less and less. She is a catty bitch. She is right, she is a star, why say that shit about having to gain 20 pounds. She is SO arrogant.

 

Beyonce: Your mom is the worst fashion designer I have seen since my seventh grade sewing fashion show, approximately 90 years ago. Not everything you touch turns to gold, girlfriend.

 

RUN Jay-Z, RUN.

Oh, I think Jay-Z is a good match for her - He's a big ol' diva too.

Is he still into trannies?

Well yeah, he was with Scary Spice, wasn't he?

Beyoncé Denies Rumors of Jennifer Hudson Feud

"I mean," said Knowles, "I wish I could've gained 20 pounds and played Effie."

MEOW!

CLAY AIKEN: LET'S FORGET ABOUT IT

 

How come no one is talking about the fact that Rosie O"Donnell blatantly OUTED Clay Aiken? Poor Kelly Ripa is being chastized for her perfectly normal reaction to Clay clamping his hand over her mouth to jokingly "shut her up" on her own TV show. No female TV host WE know of would be okay having a guest clamp his paw over her mouth and having her lipstick smeared on live TV. Granted, Aiken meant no harm - it was just rather tasteless, and Kelly's gripes about "where his hands have been " are perfectly normal. But Rosie's take on the incident - that Kelly's protest was homophobic - is laughable. In calling the incident "homophobic," Rosie carelessly (or deliberately?) OUTED Clay Aiken, who has made it clear he wants to keep his sexuality private. WE bet Clay is VERY upset with Rosie for making an issue of this, and wishes it would go away.

 

Posted by Janet Charlton

Between this and the article about little Tommy's girdle, I'm really starting to like Janet...

Quick survey... is ANYONE here on Team Heather?

No!

 

She is not of this planet. She is so arrogant, she actually believes that we would "be with her" if she had "shown the genuine character of who she is"? ARRGGHHH. If I have to see one more second of her in my life, I want to scream.

 

Have you ever seen the big gay Al and Star wedding website? IF you want a gigantic gagging laugh, look at it sometime. You have to register. I used starisapig@aol.com...go ahead and use it too.

 

Saggy and the Flame

omg that site is so funny, she's completely delusional love your e-mail addy, I used it too

 

I used that email as well. I was going to leave a message in the guest book but then I saw "Note: This is a place to celebrate love and the blessings of marriage...only guestbook entries that want to join us in our joy will be posted." so I passed. (Think I've got too much free time on my hands...)